I'm really turning things around in my life lately. The second thing that's immediately noticeable is the amount of weight I've lost recently. When I first started getting depressed, the day before Thanksgiving, I stopped being able to eat. I had to force down every bite of food I ate for a week--or was it two?
At any rate, I decided that as long as I wasn't eating very much anyway, perhaps I should start cutting back on eating the things I know are bad for me, and have more of the good. I quit with the sugar and the fried foods, replaced them with veggies and such. It's not a strict diet, it's more of a more moderate--and yet more permanent--lifestyle change. As a result, I lost 25 pounds from Thanksgiving Day to Christmas Day. This was without any change at all to how much I exercise (which is none).
Now that I'm feeling better emotionally, I've noticed my eating habits are starting to slip back to what they were. I have to get a little more discipline, is all. If I can engage in some type of regular physical activity, something to get me sweaty and raise my heart rate for at least a half hour a few times a week, that should make most of the difference. Maybe I'll even make it back to my high school weight if I keep it up; just another 40 pounds to go.
Not hard at all, right?
The other new thing I've done lately is to start hanging out more with all types of peoples. Went out to the bar last week, over to a friend's place for a party last night, and all kinds of other various social things in-between. Some time ago, people stopped asking me to go out and do things because I wouldn't ever show up. I started getting a little upset about this, thinking I wasn't desirable company, and the cycle fed itself. Now that I am going out, it's heartwarming to see how happy everyone is to see me in a social setting. It's most definitely the kind of thing I'm going to make time for more often, provided I don't go over budget.
A couple of months ago, just after the break-up, a dear friend of mine asked me over lunch what it feels like to be single. I hadn't yet started feeling the gravity of the situation, so I had no idea how bad it was going to get. Nonetheless, I did have the foresight then to tell him that I didn't know, because I wasn't single yet. I was recovering from a relationship, which is just as far away from being single as actually being IN a relationship. Now, I'm 99% recovered, enough so that I truly feel single for the first time in my adult life.
When I was 14 years old, I got into my first relationship. I've now had six of them, but with virtually no time between each to be by myself. Each time a relationship ended, I would brood over it until I became smitten with someone else, and then I'd chase her until I was in a relationship again. I'd say that the total time spent NOT in a relationship since I was 14 is about four months, if one was to add it all up, and as I said, during those months I was either brooding or chasing. Now, I'm over the pain and the problems of my last relationship's end, and there's no one currently in my life that I'm chasing. For the first time since I was 14--half a lifetime ago--I'm single.
And may I say being single at a party with attractive members of the opposite sex present is FAR more fun when I'm 28 than when I was 14.
Woot.
P.S. The subject of this blog is also the title of one of my favorite songs. Bonus points to anyone who can correctly identify the artist.
No comments:
Post a Comment